Say Hello to Your Local Hero

I want to address the issue of law enforcement neglect.  I’ll try to make it short, and sweet.

I do not have any desire to draw attention to the anti-police crowd rioting in the streets.  My blood boils whenever I’m forced to see it within the media, and through social media.  And I know you are tired of seeing them as well.  The nation is over it.

No.  Today, I want to target the majority of Americans who still feel that law enforcement officers continue to be the heroes of our time.  I am asking that you let your voice be heard.  I am asking you to show our officers that you are thankful for their service.

Because right now, they are losing faith in you.  

Courtesy of Colorado FOP

You’ll see patrol cars driving through your neighborhoods, pro-actively looking for those who seek to do the general public harm.  You’ll see a lone officer at the Chipotle, back against the wall at the rear of the restaurant (so he can analyze any potential threat that walks through the door).  That officer might stop to assist you when you’ve broken down on the side of the road.  She might even respond to your call for assistance during far more critical times.

Leave a note on their patrol cars.  Thank them for their service.  It only takes a matter of moments to make this simple gesture.  And the morale you will single-handedly supply will have a long-lasting affect. 

Arapahoe County Sheriff's Office

Walk up to a patrol officer, shake his hand, look him right in the eye, and say Thank You!  If your walking with your kids and you see a patrol car, point the officer out and wave to him.  You say, “that man is a hero.  Whenever something bad happens, that man will respond and he will help you.”

I guarantee you that most officers, not en route to a service call, will give your kids a show if you are kind.  Whenever I take my girls to the 16^th Street Mall, I always make it a point to stop and wave to the DPD officers we see.  And they always invite both of them to sit on the bikes or in the cars.

The Douglas County Sheriff’s Office is equally classy.  A friendly wave has brought several deputies to our daughters while strolling along on our evening walks.  They flip on the lights, chirp the sirens, and hand out Douglas County badge stickers.  The looks on both of my girls’ faces are always priceless.  They are absolutely mesmerized by these officers and deputies.

Your local officers and deputies are fatigued.  They have been left out to rot by the media and your local politician.  And quite frankly, they feel abandoned by you.  They are discouraged that the ignorant voices of the anti-police movement are being heard and acted upon (in favor of the common criminal).  Only small pockets of people are standing up for what is right.  The officers hang on to the hope that one day, common sense Americans will stand up for law enforcement officers and send the anti-police movement back into the shadows.  

JCSO 

Lets show our law enforcement officers that we care.  Lets restore their faith in humanity.  Say something encouraging when you see one of ‘em!  I think that this is the very least of what you could do.  Take it from me, your kind words will go a long way.

  

Thanks for listening.

Steven S. Press

Why Aren't You In A Band? The Story of Letting It All Go.

I field two questions quite frequently these days:

1)  Why did you move away from San Diego?

2)  Do you miss being in a band?

I’m not even going to start on the San Diego thing this evening.  Instead, lets go ahead and address the band.  

Jingle Ball - Arco Arena - Darin Brookner and I

I try not to think about my music industry days.  No, no, no!  Not because it was a bad experience!  It’s not that!  For me, there is a fair amount trauma (in the weakest sense of the word) surrounding our demise.  Not in a sense that we all hate each other.  More like what it was that I chose to walk away from.

Does that make any sense?   This is what I mean.

Being in a popular band and playing in front of as many people as we were created the most natural high, or biggest adrenaline rush I have ever felt.  We did it night after night.  Signing autographs, playing with bands we grew up listening to, touring the world, it was all insane.  It was beyond surreal.  Something that 99% of the world will never know. 

Australia -  The fans and I

 

Walking away from all of it was traumatic.  Getting a job and re-establishing myself as an average Joe was weird.  Watching it all fade away was hard.

I coped by blocking it all out.  I was never really good at it.  When I wasn’t able to block it out, I found myself picking up the guitar while trying to convince myself that I could do it all over again.  I know I could have, but where would I be today?  I think about that sometimes.

As I grew older, and started a family, I had to force myself to bury the past.  Having kids and being married sure helped me layer the concrete and dirt over that grave.  Funny how fast your priorities change when your love shifts from one entity to the other.  

My Family - 2015

I think I prevailed because I convinced myself that I would NOT be that 40 year old guy working at Guitar Center for the rest of my life.  I have a lot of friends who are still scraping by in the pop-punk genre.  They’re doing everything they can to remain relevant.  Even as the shows and venues get smaller and smaller, they keep plugging away.  I don’t know how I feel about it.  I suppose I feel bad for some, but I understand the rest. 

There are a lot of guys who have no idea what else they would do.  Google your favorite musician along with the phrase “I don’t know how to do anything else.” 

Walking away from music was hard, but not as hard as it would be to still be involved in it all.

I’ll tell you why.  I have a wife and three children.  In order for me to make it, this is what I would have to do.

I would have to write amazing songs that are different than everything you’ve ever heard.  Then, I would have to find a band with guys who all share common musical interest.  And we would have to play very well together.  There would have to be that “magic.”  Then we’d have to use our own money to demo all the songs.  We’d have to self-fund tours and play terrible shows until someone notices us.  We’d have to spend at least five days a week in the rehearsal studio for hours at a time ironing out and perfecting all the songs.  To make a decent living, we’d have to tour for 75% of the year. 

At the end of the day, my entire life would be spent with my band.  Not my family.  And my wife would murder me.

My rationalization, these days, is easy.  I already did the band thing, and I was successful.  It was a massive high point in my life.  I don’t have to do it again.  The desire is gone.  The memories remain. 

These days, I suppose I don’t mind talking about it as much as I used to.  I love telling the stories and showing the photos to people who are genuinely interested.  I think I don’t mind because the memories are getting a little fuzzier day by day.  I’ve been telling myself to start a journal with the stories that I am able to recall.  Something I can pass along to my kids. 

That’s all I’ve got.  I hope that answers your question.

Thanks for listening, again.

Steven

File under: Disheveled Journal Entry 

2015: We Hit the Ground Running. The Marathon, It Continues...

I haven’t written anything for a few months.  I figured January 1, 2015, would be as good a time as any to briefly recap our year.  And what a year it has been.

I’ve always found year-end resolutions to be fascinating.  I don’t have anything against New Year resolutions.  I’ve seen people accomplish great things while using January 1^st as [the starting line]. 

The average American will see approximately seventy-eight birthdays.  You probably started subscribing to the idea of yearly fresh starts in your thirties (men and women vary, of course).  Usually around the time when you’re trying to figure out whether or not your life accomplishments have made an impact within your social circle.  

We all do it.  This isn’t a slight against what it is you do.  I do it as well.  We’re always searching.  Always looking to fill that void.  With love.  With health. With service.  With religion.  With whatever it is you find value in.

I suppose this is the reason why I am fascinated by the idea of a “new start.”  Another chance.  There are so many different interpretations as to what this might mean.  This became blazingly clear as I scrolled through all the year-end posts on social media last night.  All of which I thoroughly enjoyed reading, by the way!

A fresh start, for me, is wholly intertwined with my faith in Christ.  So I see one starting line and one finish line.  Everything in between feels like milestone markers.  There are failures and victories.  Joy and sorrow.  Just like everybody else.  I see the end result as beautiful. Something to encounter fearlessly.  Courageously.  What we live for.  Saturated in grace and forgiveness.  Mercy.

I have to admit, 2014 demands a look back because our family endured and persevered through so much.  Our son, Elden, went through two heart surgeries.  We spent the better part of the first few months living at Children’s.  Heather made the decision to focus on a career in medicine.  Our daughters have reached scholastic milestones related to speech and general social skills (they’re getting so big).  We have uncovered some of Elden’s 22q setbacks and have taken the appropriate steps to get ahead of potential problems associated with those setbacks.  I transferred assignments at work and tested for promotion in December (we’ll see if it happens).

Oh, and we celebrated Valentine’s Day, our wedding anniversary, and Heather’s birthday....(Never forget, fellas).

We have so many reasons to celebrate.  I am so thankful for our victories. 

I would be lying if my failures haven’t weighed equally on my mind.  I don’t feel that it is necessary to list my transgressions here today.  But it is important for you to know that I see my opportunity for great improvement as a father, husband, son, brother, co-worker, and friend.

I want to take this moment to say that there are many of you who are true inspirations to me.  Some of you are service members [military, law enforcement, and fire].  Your service is under-appreciated by many, and you deserve unending [thanks].  Please accept my sincere, humble “Thank You.”

Others offer humble service to the community through church or charity work [with humans and animals].  Your selflessness in this area is, again, under-appreciated and largely unnoticed by those of us who are caught up in the day-to-day business of life.  Including me.  The world would be a better place if every American took a little spare time to care for the less fortunate or help to fix a broken community.  I have no doubt that one of these days, the nation will see how rewarding selfless service can be.  And there is no doubt in my mind that you are impacting those you serve in such a great way.

This doesn't mean everybody else is below a hearty [thank you].  I know so many of you who give every day your best shot.  Making a difference at a micro-level.  You are just as valuable as all others.  Because every soul you touch is worth saving.  Care packages for service members, some spare change for the homeless, holding the door open for others, placing a phone call to loved ones for a special occasion, or being there for a friend who needs you.  You are valuable beyond words.

So, in a way, this is me bidding [farewell] to 2014, and welcoming the New Year, 2015.  Chapter thirty-six, for me.  Wait, how old am I?  Many of you have made some great resolutions.  I wish you the best of luck, and Godspeed. 

Raising my mug {of coffee} to all of you today.

Happy New Year! 

From my family to yours.  

Steven    

  

Growing Up With Tooth & Nail Records: A Summary Filled With Links

Tooth & Nail Records is releasing a limited edition documentary film and photo book to celebrate twenty years of existence within the independent music scene.  I remember when I heard about the label for the first time.  I had a friend in high school named, Justice.  He handed me a demo tape before school one day and said his band had signed to a label called Tooth & Nail.  I had no idea who he was talking about, and I had never heard of his band.  Some of you might remember Bloodshed.  That was him.  

I had a friend, Josh, who really pushed me into the T&N catalogue.  He showed me a band called MxPx, and I loved them instantaneously.  We used to listen to the “Pokinatcha” cassette while driving from Fallbrook to Oceanside [to surf] nearly every day.  I think the both of us went collector crazy from that moment on.  Rather than describing how each band played a role in my life, I’ll just rattle off a list and will link the band name to a YouTube video.

The Crucified  -  Plankeye  -  Starflyer 59  -  Ghoti Hook  - Value Pac  -  Joy Electric  -  Driver 8  -  Ninety Pound Wuss  -  Strongarm  -  Joe Christmas  -  Puller  -  The O.C. Supertones  -  Stavesacre  -  Slick Shoes  -  The Juliana Theory  -  Project 86 

Josh and I would go to all the Tooth & Nail shows.  We’d drive to Orange County, L.A., or wherever a T&N show came through town.  We went to all the festivals.  I still have most of the vinyl, CDs, and posters from those shows.  

I am honored to have been able to witness, and grow with this particular label and its artists.  I am excited to see the documentary and book.  For me, it will be a large bundle of material filled with a great dose of good memories.

I hope this brought back a memory or two for you.

An Open Letter to Myself: The Story of a Tired Parent

Dear Parents,

You are heroes.  You work a full time job, maybe even two, and you return to your house where you immerse yourself in the most important role of your life.  The life of a parent.  You provide shelter, food, clothing, love, and care.  You discipline, you lead, and you do the best you can to provide moral and biblical direction.  You change diapers, resolve temper tantrums, break up sibling 300'esque [movie] type battles over a piece of paper or a crayon, and at the end of the day, you wash it off with a shower, swallow it down with an adult beverage, or read it away through the latest, best-selling fiction novel.

You know that appreciation, if any, will come several decades down the road when your kids finally realize that you were doing the best you could.  If you're lucky, you're married to your best friend.  A man or woman that helps you and encourages you in every way.  It certainly helps.  Because this is the kind of challenge that was meant specifically for a team of two dedicated people: mom and dad.

And some of you; you do it alone.  Everything still applies.  You are a true warrior.  Making it all happen in any way you can.

With that being said, let me offer a word of advice.  And I direct this toward myself as much as any other.  Let down your guard.  Take off the game face when you're around me.  I need to know you are real.  I need to know that you are tired, just like me! 

Show me a parent who doesn't feel like a failure in one way or another, and I will find you a Frozen unicorn with Tinkerbell wings.  And if a parent tells you that they are flaw-free, ditch their "friendship" and find a pair of parents who are willing to tell you that they struggle from time to time.

Cut yourself some slack!  You stuck around.  You didn't leave.  You listen to your wife.  You listen to your husband.  You are an example of love, and a Christ-like depiction of what a marriage should look like.  You love your children and you show it.  You apologize when you are wrong.  You pray, asking God to work on problem areas in your life.  You lay your issues at His feet.  This is what your children see.  This is the example they will mimic when they mature and make families of their own.  All the rest is water under the bridge if you truly commit to bettering yourself every moment of every day.

I suppose my point is this:

I know you're doing the very best that you can.  If you weren't doing the best you can, then I'm sure you'd hear about it from those you love or the proper local authorities.  Everybody has flaws.  They obviously become very apparent when children come bouncing into the picture.  But you have to know that I am more inspired by those of you who said "this is hard," than by those of you who said "I've got this thing nailed down."

Lets send some good, God-fearing kids into this world.  Heaven knows they need it.  

Sincerely,

Steven

   

My Treehouse in the Shire: A Momentary Escape from Reality

I think my mind wanders more during the busy season.  For me, this usually means that I am in school, working a full time job, and being a full time parent + husband.  I suppose my mind would rather daydream than figure out statistics.  That’s all of us though, right?

Lately, I have been thinking about how much time I spend doing things other than spending time with my family.  I think about how much time I spend stuck on the freeway in traffic or how much time I spend at work.  I think about how much time I spend studying for school, or stressing about my assignments.  I think about the money my wife and I must make to keep everything moving forward while staying out of the red.

When I think about all of the time I spend in the pursuit of superficial things, I have to admit it’s a little depressing.  If all of these responsibilities just disappeared, how much more time would I be able to spend with my kids and my wife?  How much more time would I be able to nurture great relationships with all of them?

Bear with me.  This is MY world for a brief moment in time.  

My daydreams show me (us) living in a Swiss Family Robinson’esque treehouse in some desolate forest, away from the rest of the world.  Or maybe one of the little Hobbit holes from the Shire.  We’d live off the land.  Harvest our own crops, bring home fresh game for the stove.  No cell phones, no bills.  No cars, no gas.  No crime, no locks.    No boys who would court my daughters...

I hate the idea of turning my children loose in this world.  There!  I said it! 

I am already heartbroken for them.  I don’t want them to experience pain, defeat, loss, suffering, ridicule, and all the rest of the bad we are so good at providing others.

And then I come to.  I wake up.  I snap back to reality.

I’ve never been one for pity-parties.  I’m certainly a lot tougher than that.  We buckle in for the ride.  We rub a little dirt on it.  Put duct tape over the wound.  Crack our fingers and we’re right back at it.  Because that’s what we do.

I’ve got all the answers.  That’s what I tell myself.  Funny thing is, I am terrible at implementing my own advice into my life.

I am sure most of you can relate.

I love thinking about these things.  These places.  My little make-believe realities.  They are like mini-vacations throughout the day.  I find comfort there.  My family is safe. 

Here is my reality.  My log house in the woods exists.  And I’ll be there with my family, eventually.  We all get there one way or the other.  Where you at?

Thanks for listening to a little randomness. 

Steven

“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”  Revelation 21 v. 4

“But, as it is written, “What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love him..” 1 Corinthians 2 v. 9

Why Ferguson, Missouri Matters: The Story of a LEO Hung Out to Dry

This was written by a FOP rep named Sean McCauley.  I tried to put it in better words, but couldn't.
Thank You, Mr. McCauley:

I thought that I had flushed the Ferguson situation out of my system with my last post, but a two hour flight gave me more time with my thoughts. I have purposefully remained silent over the last week because the facts of the case in Ferguson were still unclear, though the original accounts certainly seemed suspect. I knew that it would take time for accurate information to gradually flow out to determine what happened that afternoon. The case will proceed, as it should, through a formal investigation with an ultimate decision made through legal process.

For those of you who know me and now what I do, you probably have figured out long ago where I stand on this issue. As an attorney, I have handled hundreds of officer involved shooting over the last 14 years. I am not a police defensive tactics expert or a police psychologist, but I can tell you from experience I know what officers go through during and after an OIS. It is a trying experience. None of them go to work hoping to get involved in a shooting. And none of them are the same after the fact. They will tell you that they are okay, but, in the end, they are human beings and taking a life, however justified, leaves an indelible mark on one’s soul. They are never truly the same afterwards.

Officer Wilson is going through much the same situation, but under the microscope of the nation and that makes the situation for him exponentially worse. It is something no one should have to go through. While the uninformed and inexperienced debate what he could have done or should have done, Officer Wilson is left with only that he had to do. Assuming that the facts that have come out are true, and I have no reason to doubt them, at that fateful moment when he chose to fire, there was no hate in his heart, no racism coursing through his mind, no macho desire to take a life, the only thing there was fear. Fear that he would not see his family again, fear that he would die right there in the middle of the street, fear that his last though would be “Should I fire?” His entire life flashed before him in that instant, his vision tunneled, his body reverted to his training and he made the decision- a decision that likely saved his life, and one that most of us will never have to make. And now he is left to deal with the aftermath of that decision.

And he feels alone. He feels abandoned. And why wouldn’t he. Elected officials and the media have prejudged the situation from as far as Martha’s Vineyard and as close as Ferguson itself. Governor Nixon and others, who have supported officers in the past, have jumped to the politically expedient side of the issue because they seek higher office or hope to retain their current one. They have judged the situation based on the account of someone who has every reason to lie. They have done exactly what they ridicule the police for doing, they have judged the situation based not on the facts, but on personal prejudice. In this case, it is not the color of the man’s skin, but rather the color of his uniform. I am a liberal and most of my clients question my political persuasion. After the experience of the last several days, I questioned it myself. I always believed that my side, for the most part, stood on the side that supports the constitution and our legal system, the side that supports innocent until proven guilty, the side that supports the bill of rights, the side that supports factual investigations in its pursuit of justice. But the reality is they only support one thing.

Themselves.

But Darren rest assured you are not alone. You will not be abandoned. Because when all others run, when they walk away from what’s right to protect their own self- interest, when they stand in front of a camera to score political points, when they promote a self-aggrandizing agenda, there’s only one thing left. And that is the thin blue line. Because in reality the only thing that officers can truly rely on is each other. Others mock it, call it corrupt, but this is situation illustrates why it exists. And that line will not fade. It will not shrink. It will not disappear. And behind that thin blue line and the men that make it up, is the Fraternal Order of Police. We all got your six Darren, and we are not going anywhere until the truth wins out.

END

+++++++

Supplement:  Steven Press

As of today, 1,047 citizens have donated $40,145 toward Officer Darren Wilson's expenses during his leave from the department.  This does not include the sale of support t-shirts at $18-20 per shirt.  Over 1,000 of these shirts have already been sold and the proceeds will benefit Officer Wilson and his family.

Please drop by the Support Officer Darren Wilson site, and show your support!  

Thanks!

Steven