We Are Impenetrable: To the Death

I wrote an extensive research paper last semester that covered the topic of pain as it relates to divorce.  My goal was to show that divorce, or more importantly, the absence of a mother or father [single parent household], places a heavy burden on the shoulders of each child.  As I read through the research, I found that the issue of residual pain was often skirted and other issues fell in line. 

For instance, many of those interviewed indicated that their parents' divorce was “the best for both of them” because the household became a poisonous dwelling.  Many indicated that they felt indifference when their parents split and felt no residual pain as the years passed by.

There is no doubt that unhappy marriages cause just as much damage as an actual parental split.  But I’d like to go ahead and throw up the “BS” sign if a large portion of the interviewees say that they feel no residual pain.

Every single person I know who has fought through a broken home has readily admitted that they have been affected in one way or another.  There is pain.  There is anger.  There is hurt.  And just like anything else, we bury it all under our defenses as each new day presents itself.

Countless songs have been written, diary entries penned, and words of anger thrown.

So why do many others deny the hurt that has to exist?

As I was thinking about writing this today, I couldn’t help but remember that human beings are experts at masking pain.  If I’m having a bad day, you’re not going to see it on my face.  I’m hiding it.  I’m a pro.  I can’t afford to let you see it and I don’t feel like explaining it.  

C.S. Lewis wrote a book entitled, “The Problem of Pain.”  I’ve always found great comfort in his writing.  He states, “Mental pain is less dramatic than physical pain, but it is more common and also more hard to bear. The frequent attempt to conceal mental pain increases the burden: it is easier to say 'My tooth is aching' than to say 'My heart is broken.”

Such is the modern world.  We refuse to communicate.  And communication is what we need the most (but with whom?).

Lewis goes on to say, “We can ignore even pleasure. But pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.” 

I always see a reminder in this statement.  Community is necessary, and I love the people who choose to listen to me wholeheartedly.  But for some reason, it is hard for me to release all that I’ve got when I know that the recipient of my conversation is just as broken as I am.

I’ve never been good at talking to God.  But I know that He hears me perfectly and He is perfect.  I know He listen intently, and His love is unbreakable. 

 

Essentially, I am reminded that all are in need of a Saviour.  I hope that this might be a reminder for you today as well. 

Thanks for listening.

Steven

Watch: Stay Together for the Kids  

Curtain Call: The Last Update

I know most of you have been following the updates on Facebook but I figured I’d go ahead and cap it all off right now. 

The surgery was a success.  The inadequate parts of Elden’s heart were mended in surgery over a period of four or five hours.  He will attend yearly checkups for the rest of his life to monitor the condition.  During our stay at the hospital, he was given a genetics test and it was discovered that he has DiGeorge Syndrome, or 22q deletion.

At first, the new announcement seemed like another blow to the jaw.  As time has passed, I found that my concern was selfish and quite petty as I compared his circumstances to others that were present at Children’s.  So rather than inundate my friends and family with a barrage of updates on Elden’s progression, as it relates to his congenital heart defect and 22q setbacks, we will, instead, celebrate his victories and his life equally alongside our two daughters.  

To put this 22q thing into a nutshell:  Heather and I will have to detect certain symptoms and respond accordingly.  By all accounts (from genetics Ph.D’s), his particular case appears to be mild.  Only time will tell.  Check out the 22q page for more info.   

What does this really mean for us?  Nothing.  We are charged with rearing him just like any other normal kid.  Elden loves music.  He can watch me play the guitar for an hour straight and he smiles when I sing New Amsterdams songs.  He loves playing with his sisters and mommy makes him smile with the sound of her voice.  He loves his squeaky toys and is mesmerized by Elmo.  Derek and Emily discovered a sound that he loved instantaneously.  Fortunately, Mary taught me how to make the sound a few years back so now I can cheer him up within a matter of seconds.

What I love most of all is that he loves to communicate.  He is already offering up squeaky, giggly responses to my ridiculous inquiries.  I’ll ask him if he feels like joining me for a Stella while we watch the Broncos beat down another rival.  Every once in a while I’ll see if he’d like a piece of albacore nigiri.  And I know he’s always down for a burrito!

So ya’ got it in a nutshell.  Elden will be playin’ ball and hating mathematics right next to your kids.  Maybe he’ll be patrolling the city streets with your friendly local law enforcement agency.  Or maybe he’ll walk onto a stage with an instrument in front of a packed arena like his old man used to do. 

The kid is five months old and he’s already hurdled an immeasurable obstacle.  God is on his side.  We’ve got his back.  Nothing can stop him.  

Cheers.

The Press Family

Romans 5 v. 3-4  ....we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope....

I Will Never Meet Your Expectations: The Story of a Bonafide Screw-up

I reviewed my list of past blog topics the other day and felt it necessary to address a glaring reality:  I am an expert at not following my own advice.

Christians will never live up to your expectations.  I will never live up to your expectations.  If you knew me, you would know that I have failed you on a daily basis.  I have failed you in the past, and I will fail you in the future.  

I believe this is part of the reason why the church has suffered so much loss.  Secular progressives have successfully ascribed the perception of perfection to the Christian population.  So when we mess up, they are quick to point out how we are flawed and, therefore, unauthentic and hypocritical.  You cannot look to us as examples of perfection.  You have to look at God.

The bible was not written as a law book for Christian living.  It was written so that sin might be exposed and a Savior might be revealed.  If anything, as the Christian reads through the bible, he comes to an understanding of how pathetic a human being he really is.  He realizes the need for a Savior. 

Those who make an attempt at earthly perfection through strict adherence to biblical law have missed the mark entirely.  Perfection is unattainable.  Only one man was able to achieve perfection and that was Jesus Christ.  He died so that you would not perish for being wholly imperfect.

So as I write on the topics of marriage, communication, religion, politics, pride, moral issues, and randomness, know that I have failed miserably in every regard.

This Christmas, I am thankful that God chose to send His son to die in my stead.  Because of Him, my imperfection becomes perfection.  There will never be enough thanks and my own works will never suffice.  His sacrifice was more than enough.

Secular Extremism: The New Religion of Nothingness

A Douglas County [Colorado] charter school will no longer participate in a Christmas donation program for disadvantaged children because of the threat of a lawsuit. “The issue is not the gift, but the religious message that comes along with it, which acts as a catch for the generosity,” says Kimberly Saviano.

Christianity is under a full-frontal attack by secular extremists.  Every waking moment is spent at the drawing board figuring out new ways to wipe God’s name off the face of the earth.  Remember when “Merry Christmas” fell under attack?  Now, you’d be hard pressed to find a commercial on television highlighting our beloved traditional greeting and the actual meaning of the day has been all but erased from the pages of our history books. As the years have passed, retail outlets have quietly abandoned “Merry Christmas” in favor of “Happy Holidays.”  Spineless, to say the least.  

Photo By: The Atheist Antidote

The [school Academy] story I mentioned above is merely one small example out of the thousands I could mention.  I bring light to it because this case is unraveling right next door.  The American Humanist Association has threatened to sue the SkyView Academy for collecting shoeboxes filled with toys, candy, and hygiene items for distribution to children around the world.  The Samaritan’s Purse, a non-denominational Christian organization, is responsible for the distribution of these shoeboxes.  SkyView students are not required to participate.

Let me say it like this:  The American Humanist Association wants to sue the school for contributing to a charity because the facilitating organization is a non-denominational Christian church.  They would rob children of these gifts because they are collected and distributed by a Christian organization.

Do you feel any steam coming out of your ears?  If the answer is yes, then do something about it!  Brave parents held a rally on public property around the school and collected shoeboxes in spite of the decision to cancel this charity event.  Five-hundred boxes were collected.  

Don’t think it affects you?  The war on Christianity is going to land right on your doorstep and it’ll be uglier than a flaming bag of dog turds.  Remove your head from underneath the social media blinders long enough to read the paper and take a good look at what is going on. 

I understand the comfort that exists in the reclusive life we create through online mediums.  It allows us to escape the evil of this world.  Just remember that the atrocities merely expand as your head remains buried in the sand.  It doesn’t stop.

Stand up!  Say something!  Get involved!  You’re being steam-rolled by a minority of people who believe in absolutely nothing and it doesn’t have to happen.

Watch this video entitled "One Nation Under Atheism (Founding Faith)" by Brock Lawley.

Thanks for stayin' with me here today.

Steven

Psalm 14 v. 1 says, “The fool says in his heart, ‘There is no God.’  They are corrupt, they do abominable deeds, there is none who does good.”

John 3 v. 18-19 says, “Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only Son of God. And this is the judgment: the light has come into the world, and people loved the darkness rather than the light because their works were evil.”

Lets See Some Identification: Why Church "Membership" is Counter-Christ

     I’ve been checking out a few local church websites over the last few weeks and made a startling discovery.  Churches with high attendance who employ pastors with Ph.D’s in theology have a “membership” stipulation for those who might seek regular attendance.  I was even more surprised to find that one of my favorite speakers imposes the same stipulation at his church.  One statement, found within the “Membership FAQ’s,” states, “If you’re not a member, then you’re technically a guest that remains to a certain extent separated from our church family, and separated from the maturity, protection, accountability, and care that comes with being an active part of the church.”  Continued, “in short, the difference between a member and a non-member is that members are ‘on mission.”  As I mentioned a moment ago, churches within my own city have followed suit.  

     Startling, saddening, and humorous all at once.  I picture heavily muscled men at the door checking ID’s and membership cards.  While the guests are motioned toward the nosebleed seats, members take their place in the front row.

     When Jesus gave His [Sermon on the Mount], I am pretty sure the disciples were not milling through the crowd with connection cards in an effort to procure members.  The crowd was present because they wanted to hear what Jesus had to say.  Many left “on mission.”  And guess what?  They weren’t members.

     What a disheartening stain on the face of Christianity.  Religion defined in its purest form, I suppose.  Pastors:  if you have been called into ministry, then do what you do best; lead people to Christ!  Police officers do what they do because they love what they do.  They know they won’t be getting rich any time soon, but they protect and serve with passion.  How is it any different for you?  If you have to ensure a steady income and a steady stream of volunteers through “church membership” then you have missed the point of being in the presence of God when two or more are gathered.

     Lastly, I would like to sincerely thank all of the pastors and churches who have not imposed membership criteria on their congregations.  Thank you for letting the parishioners sit within your sanctuary obligation free.  And NO, this is not a copout argument.  You cannot say that only members are generous with their time and treasure.  I would argue that "guests" are just as valuable.  

     For the non-believer:  Christ never said you have to be a “member” of anything.  Romans 10 v. 9 says, “Because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.”  Furthermore, John 5 v. 24 says, “Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life. He does not come into judgment, but has passed from death to life.”  And you can never forget John 3:16.

    

     File under: RANT

                                          Steven

My Stingy Wallet - The Story of a Bum Who Exposed my Selfishness

Quick Statistics:  January-2013

* 11,167 people are homeless in Denver

* 43% are women

* 62% are adults with children

* 25.4% are newly homeless

* A mother with an infant child living in Denver County would need to earn $15.51/hour working full time ($32,760/year) to make ends meet.

* 1 in 5 Colorado households cannot afford to make ends meet

(Information obtained from http://mdhi.org)

The issue of homelessness has always weighed heavily on my mind.  I, like many others, am guilty of avoiding eye contact with the individual on the corner holding a sign which lists the details of their particular situation.  Why?  Because I am in love with my wallets' contents.  

Are you like me?  Whenever someone asks me for some spare change I run through a list of reasons why I "can't afford" to empty the dimes and nickels from my pocket.  Ten minutes later, I will walk into the convenience store and purchase a $1.69 bottle of Dr. Pepper.

Then, my mind will dutifully remind me that this person will likely spend the money I give them on drugs or alcohol.    

I remember when I broke away from that train of thought.  I happened to be watching a comedian who was speaking on the topic of homelessness.  He said, "when you give a homeless guy a pocket full of change what do you think he is going to do with it?  Go make a deposit in his bank account?" 

Homelessness brings light to my selfishness.  This is an area of weakness in my life.  I love my things.  I am attached to my things.  I work hard for my things and I only want to share what I have with my family.

Matthew 25 v. 42-45 says, "For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not clothe me, sick and in prison and you did not visit me. Then they also will answer, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not minister to you?' Then he will answer them, saying, Truly, I say to you, as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me."

I am also reminded of the man who Jesus told to sell everything he owned and follow Him. The guy couldn't do it.  He was attached to his stuff.  Just like I am.  Just like you are.

I used the word "bum" because that is what I used to call them (the term has long been removed from my vocabulary).  In my mind, they were all lazy addicts who merely want to live off the taxpayer dime.  There is some truth in this statement.  2/3 of homeless people report that drugs and/or alcohol were a major reason for their becoming homeless and there are people who have no drive to get a job.  

Addiction does exist among the homeless population.  I would argue that this does not give us an excuse to love them less nor should we let these individuals cast an example over the entire homeless population.  There are several top reasons why someone might be homeless including economic crisis.  And you know firsthand we are seeing a lot of that right now.

I'd like to encourage you to watch the attached interview with Chicago resident Ronald Davis (see link below) who was homeless as of this year.  

As I watched Ronald's story, I couldn't help but think about my own need for grace.  We are all broken in one way or another.  Romans 3 v. 20-24 says, "For by works of the law no human being will be justified in his sight, since through the law comes knowledge of sin. The Righteousness of God Through Faith but now the righteousness of God has been manifested apart from the law, although the Law and the Prophets bear witness to it— the righteousness of God through faith in Jesus Christ for all who believe. For there is no distinction: for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus."

We should be engaging the homeless population as Christ would have.  Talk with them.  Their stories will move you.

See Ronald Davis' story HERE.

The Little Girl Dreams Big

The Little Girl Dreams Big

by: Steven S. Press

I used to watch the elderly couple hold hands at the park.  They’d kiss and they’d snuggle from afternoon until dark.

And when it was time to go home for the night, her eyes would meet his under the brilliant moonlight. 

I’d watch the boy chase the girl and he’d present to her a rose, and she’d respond to his gesture with a punch to the nose.

I laughed as she giggled and turned to run away, he was hot on her heels and eager to play.

These are the things that define beauty for me, their love and innocence seem so delicately free.

I can’t help but think of my son as he aged, and I cherish every memory with each passing day.

My boy is my world, he’s my strength, he’s my rock, and I’d give him the world, even turn back the clock...

To read him another story or take a walk by the lake, and we’d sing one more song for killing time’s sake.

I’ve been through rough patches, lost all that I’ve owned, had an affair with the bottle and struck out on my own.

I’d think about my son and all the time that we’d spend, and I’d pray to the Lord that this would come to an end.

I worked my way back and made a life for myself, with my dog and my cats as I’ve been nursed back to health.

As I look out the window of this quaint little shack, I can’t help but smile as I start to unpack...

All the dreams and desires my mind bore as a girl, as I’d run from the boy who simply wanted to whirl.

I know that he’s out there, I might accept that red rose, and walk down the aisle in white as the story it goes.

Until that day I am happy, I’m free, and I’ll live life to the fullest until I cease to be.